Good ladies are all married 

Ladies, with both beautiful hearts and outer appearances are all married and the few remaining single ones are already single mothers with a kid or two to their names.

Not trying to be hard on this wonderfully created creatures, all I’m trying to say is wife materials are all gone. As extinct as a dodo. Talking of which, how cruel can humanity be. Consuming a whole of a species until it’s no more. That bird must have been one of the most delicious bird to ever walk on earth. Rest in peace dodo! Hope one day you will have justice. My brother Alfred tells  me that if we are not careful, the ostrich is most likely to be the next victim.

Mankind with his appetite, God forbid! Not the Great ostrich.

Back on the wife or girl issue, the reason I am here, bundled on this not cozy chair trying to write you this piece. Just like any other young man, with the exception of a few rotten apples, I too one day God willing I wanna get married. I wanna get married to a beautiful woman with a good heart, not just health wise. I am talking about someone with a good soul, Mother Teresa like.

Women are very important beings. Women can make or destroy a man and I know you have heard this saying that behind every successful man there is a woman. Don’t know how true this saying is, but what I’m sure of is the fact that you marry a great woman and you are most likely to succeed in life. The same  goes to if you marry an evil or emotionally corrupt woman, you are in trouble bro. Remember that Bible story about Samson and Delilah? Think about that.

My siblings and I were raised by only mom in what you can call broken family, but I hate that. Makes me angry and hate dad even more. Dad was alive but chose to stay away with the second family leaving every responsibility to my poor mother. You can imagine a young Ugandan woman, born and raised in the LRA (Lord’s Resistance Army) infested region, in a foreign country left to raise a couple of kids on her own.

Mother left her home many years ago, barely out of her teenage stage herself, alongside this man she had fallen in love with, only to be brought here and be mistreated. A well refined Kenyan man in pursuit of success in the medical world, at the time circumnavigating Museveni’s land doing various medical research.

It wasn’t fair, especially to mama but nothing in life is fair. No one knows what tomorrow has in store for them, you just have to live each day as it comes and hope for the best. Better yet, pray for the best. Mother was forced to adapt to the Kenyan life with god speed. She had to learn to survive lest we all suffer. She had an option. She could just have walked away from all that pain and suffering and never look back, but she chose to stay. She chose us!

Few years down the line here we are, very strong, ambitious and optimistic about the future. Thank God she is still alive, as strong as ever and I believe one day her sacrifice will pay off. God never sleep (though not 100% sure).

By now you already know why I will give anything to have a real African woman. As real as my dear mother. A woman who will do anything possible to see her kids survive. A woman who will go barefoot to ensure her children have shoes on their feet as they hurry to school. A woman who will give up her own dreams to make sure her kids have one.

Hope you won’t try to judge me or criticize me for saying I want a woman who has qualities similar to that of my mother. That’s just the way it is. Men are always comparing and if your mother was as wonderful as mine, you will want your woman to be like her but when your mother was the wicked type with the characteristics of Mama G of Nollywood, you will be looking for a woman who is a complete contrast to her.

I know time has changed, and someone somewhere is likely to shout to me it’s 21st century which I already know by the way, but people haven’t changed. People are still people with the exception of stone age generation. Human values are still desired and vices will forever be rebuked. Good beautiful women with exceptional moral standards will forever be sought. So it’s not the case of age or time.

Women of our age are very complicated and a bit confusing. I interact with them on daily basis. I take matatus with some of them, I share classes with them, I serve some of them in my sister’s shop and I honestly tell you what I see in most of them is enough reason to be worried.

Women wanted to be equal to men. Now they are. They wanted to be as empowered as men. They got empowered which is great because I want people like my mom to have a voice too. To be part of the world around them. To have control of their lives and that of those around them, when everything else collapses. But I now wonder how much of all these “equality” and “empowerment”  noise had a negative toll on our women. We as boys, the girls we are being raised with are terrifying.

Nowadays it’s very hard to maintain a relationship that can end up with marriage. Relationship is important too, I think. In a relationship as boyfriend and girlfriend you get to know each other properly and you can decide if he or she is the person you will like to get married to. If yes, you go ahead and start a family, and if not you break it off and try with someone else. But nowadays girls are after loaded, older and mostly married men. You get a beautiful girl today, fall in love and everything is good, and the next day you find out it was just a dream. She’s gone. With her girlfriends went to that party in Westland and never came back.

I don’t know who I will get married to or if I will get married at all, but in case I do, I pray to God she will be a gift and not a curse.

Life is way too short to spend it with a woman who has no conscience.

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