Don’t force people to stay in your life


The year 2019 is only a day away and I’ve been deeply pondering over how I wanna usher it in and how I wanna live the rest of it. I’ve also been thinking about this dying year, 2018; some of the highs and the lows I’ve had, and some of the things, especially the bad people in my life, the bad habits that I should leave behind in this year.

The year 2018 started well for me and I had so much hope of even living up to some of the resolutions I made at the start of this year, but along the way fate took its course and now I’m ending this year with very few things to smile about. In short 2018 for me has been a bad year and I ain’t shy to say this. Achieved very few of those resolutions I wasted so much time writing, instead of going out to enjoy the New Year with my friends.

Talking of Resolutions, this time round I won’t be wasting any of my time on that shit. Didn’t even have a wish list for Santa this Christmas. In fact if there is any resolution I will be making this New Year, is about my decision to get more close to God — I believe He lives and He’s behind the being of this enormous Universe. Even before the Big Bang Theory, The Supernova and other theories, there was something behind that matter, and that must be God — and second, to let go of all the fake and negative people in my life and hold on to a few loyal friends that will be left after my thorough vetting.

The latter is one of the reasons I’ve had a bad year, and so I strongly believe. Hundreds of friends but when I needed any of them they were nowhere to be seen. They only lived online. God forbid! I don’t need online friends, I need real friends! I need friends who will come and listen to me if I need someone to talk to. I need a friend who will not let me go to Tala or take my laptop to the loan shark to beg for a loan if they have some cash. I don’t need friends who only show up when they need my help, when the table is laid out and disappear the moment they’ve had their fill.

I am single (can’t believe I wrote this), thanks to slayqueens — materialistic-minded women with twisted beliefs about relationships that we have today. I’ve had enough of these girls. They take away a lot of your energy and time. Some of us still have family looking up to us (we are their only hope) and don’t want to die prematurely of HIV/AIDS by chasing different girls in the name of being a “player”. I’m just a young man with dreams of my own, only starting out and very optimistic about the future, especially as far as my writing is concerned, and anything that comes in between me and that goal, if not to help or encourage me achieve it, is unwelcome. Be it women, friends, or even family.


I’m at a point in my life where I only need positive people in my life; real family, loyal friends and good neighbors. If you are non of the above, just know I don’t need you in 2019. You have like a day or two to make a decision on where you wanna be. You have less than two days to appeal your case or risk losing a true friend forever. Give me a reason why I should keep you as a friend! Come and give me a reason why you think I should still respect you as family! And remember you only have up to 31st.

In 2019 don’t even try calling me. Don’t come to me with “I just wanted to know how you are doing,” cause that shit wont work homie.

In 2019 we are no longer begging people to stay in our lives. If you wanna be part of me, I will welcome you with open arms, I will take you in and I will take care of you with all the love in the world, I can promise you that. But if you think I’m not enough, that maybe I’m not worth your friendship and your affection, the door is wide open dear! Go on, leave and never for a moment think about coming back. You would just have proved I didn’t need your sorry ass in my life.


I congratulated you on your graduation, did you try asking how I was doing after my deferment? Or you think you’re the only one with feelings! No one way traffic in friendship “friend”.

10 thoughts on “Don’t force people to stay in your life

  1. I think that this piece represents one of the best resolutions that one could have, Madekesi! Only keep the positive, real people in your life. The rest of them are just energy-draining leeches. Hopefully I make your list of people to keep around! Keep writing, Brother, and Happy New Year!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Hope 2019 begins and ends better for you. You’re right to be selective about friendships, and to seek them in the ‘real ‘ world; life is too short to seek the good opinion of those who don’t care about us.

    Liked by 1 person

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